To quote Taylor Swift, we hope Bill Maher is ready for it.
And by it, we mean the extreme wrath of the most dedicated fanbase on the planet.
On the most recent episode of his podcast, you see, the HBO host and alleged comedian was talking to the Hawk Tuah Girl (real name: Haliey Welch).
Because of course he was, right?
For some reason, the conversation eventually turned to Swift’s relationship with Kansas City Chiefs tight end Travis Kelce.
“I’m sure she’s a lovely person, but the whole thing with the football player,” Maher said, immediately sounding like a moron, making it sound as if he doesn’t know the name of Kelce.
Maher continued:
“I just felt like 35 was a little old to be like, ‘My boyfriend’s a football player and I wear his jersey to the game with his number on it!’ I mean, come on.”
How dare Swift be supportive and have fun, you know?
Welch thankfully defended Swift from Maher dumb and random attack, saying simply:
“Whatever makes her happy. If that’s what she wants to do and it makes her happy, it ain’t got nothin’ to do with me.”
Maher mostly agreed with this obvious point.
But he wasn’t done trashing Swift and coming across like a total and complete idiot.
“He’s gonna dump her, though, You know that?” Maher went on. “With her, it’s like the Gatorade at the Super Bowl, you know you’re gonna get dumped. You just don’t know when.”
Wow. What a hilarious joke.
By most accounts, of course, Kelce and Swift are a lot closer to getting married than they are to splitting up.
“You gotta think about it this way,” Welch said, playing along with Maher’s premise. “If he does that, can you imagine the next album we’re gonna get off of that?”
Maher proceeded to say Swift continuing to sing about her ex-lovers was “very tacky” and said it might be time for Swift to take a look in the mirror.
“It does seem like such a recurrent theme,” he argued. “At some point, you just wanna say, maybe you should write a song called ‘Maybe It’s Me.’”
Yes, Taylor Swift is so tacky that she has the love of a strong, good man; the affection of millions of people around the globe; and the highest-grossing tour in the history of music.
Will she soon add a diamond ring to this collection?
“It’s not even on his radar,” an insider recently told Us Weekly about Kelce’s proposing.
“Marriage is something he takes very seriously and not something he would ever just jump into without giving it some careful consideration.”